31 Days of Horror... 2021

 Annual "31 Days of Horror" movie list.

I missed a few days... kind of sad about it. Tried to make up for it.
 1. Creature From the Black Lagoon
 2. Dracula
 2.B Frankenstein
 3. Friday the 13th
 4 Friday the 13th Part Two
 4B. Friday the 13th Part Three
 5 Friday the 13th Part Four: The Final Chapter.
 5.B Venom: Let There Be Carnage
 6. Solomon Kane
 7 Nightmare on Elm Street
 8 Terror Train
 8B. Angel\

9
 10. People Under the Stairs
 10B. Prince of Darkness
 11 Freddy Vs. Jason
 11b. Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan
 12. Friday the 13th (2009)
 13 Friday the 13th Part 6: Jason Lives
 14. Nightmare on Elm Street 3: The Dream WArriors
 15. Halloween Kills
 16. V/H/S/ '94
 17.. Seance
 18 Blood REd Sky
 19. Night Teeth
 20. Superhost
 21 The Curse of the Werewolf
 22.
23
24.
25 Slumber Party Massacre
26 Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight
27. Young Frankenstein
29. Halloween
30. Invisible Man
30b Wolf Man
30c. Butchers
30d. Butchers
30e. Shadow in the Clouds
31. Arsenic and Old Lace
31b. Monster Squad
31c. The Evil Dead.

 

Halloween Kills 2021: Evil will die tonight!!!

 

"Evil will die tonight!" 

The movie opens with a trip down memory lane, just past the closing moments of the original Halloween- as police are on the trail of Myers, following him to his home where he kills again. Where we see more of the terror he left behind on that awful night, after the credits rolled in the original John Carpenter classic. It closes a small hole left behind with the 2018 "sequel", which ignores all of the franchise films and focuses on what was left behind in that original film. 

And in 2018, Evil will die tonight. 

For Laurie Strode, it was a promise that failed to materialize within the opening moments of Halloween Kills, as Michael escapes the "death trap" we last saw him in. He is still the Shape, he is still the essence of evil. And he still has evil to do. 

He Kills again. And again. 

Evil will die tonight. 

For the former victims of Michael Myers, it's a rallying cry to strengthen them against fear of the dark and the lingering memories of Halloween 1978. Four survivors, Tommy Doyle, Lonny Elam, Lindsay Wallace, and Marion Chambers reminisce at a bar where they relate the events for locals and pay tribute to the dead and still living. Then they receive the news- Michael is back. 

Evil will die tonight. 

Tommy Doyle (Anthony Micheal Hall) will not stand aside to let others protect him anymore. He declares the above statement with rage, with fear, with determination to fight against the dark, to cast out the demon that has haunted his sleep for decades. It's a battle cry quickly picked up by the other people in town- echoing down the streets, in the hospital corridors, in the homes of frightened Haddonfield- it echoes loud, insistent, and virulently. 

Michael's greatest evil is the fear he creates- not just the victims of his brutality, but the families, the friends, the lovers, wives, husbands, children, and parents. And righteous rage will burn and it will consume- Halloween Kills is horror at it's best, at it's most brutal, at it's most gory, at it's most primal, it's most savage, it's more fear-drenched and it is a work of cinematic perfection.

10 out of 10

GI JOE BINGE thoughts.

 

GI Joe had some very odd seasons- in the first season, it was mostly a short serial involving the Weather Dominator and it focused on the initial Joe figurines. General Hawk led the team with the first figures, but this initial series focused mostly on Duke, Scarlett, and Snake Eyes.They fought the evil forces of Cobra, attempting to regain the broken pieces of Cobra's "Weather Dominator" device- a satellite that could control and terrorize the planet. It was fairly straightforward and was, itself, designed to act as a commercial to sell the toy-line.

The second season included the second series of Joes, though they still had many episodes that involved or focused on some of the classic Joes, including an "Elseworld" episode where the classic characters Grunt, Clutch, and Steeler would stay behind in order to fight the forces of Cobra in that other world where their duplicates had been killed in action. Joes featured in this series were largely Flint, Lady Jaye, Quick Kick, Alpine, Wild Blll, Mutt & Junkyard, and many more-- including my favorite episode that heavily featured Barbecue, the Joe fire rescue specialist.

I am currently on the third series, which focuses on the creation and rise of Serpentor as Cobra's new leader, replacing Cobra Commander. This would also heavily introduce Sgt. Slaughter as one of the lead trainers for GI Joe, and introduced many new recruits to the team: Lifeline, Leatherneck, Sci-Fi, Beach-head, and Wet-Suit. One of the primary running side-plots was the impending star crossed lover story between Zartan's sister Zaranna and GI Joe computer specialist Main-Frame.

All of this led to GI Joe: The Movie- intended for theatrical release, the animated feature film included celebrity voices such as Don Johnson as Duke's younger brother, Falcon. This film would introduce the far more fantasy-centric villains from "Cobra-La", an ancient snake cult that would ally with Cobra to fight our erstwhile heroes.

It was that film that sort of jumped the shark by stretching beyond the high concept ideas of a specialized Military Unit fighting an organized criminal terrorist organization. While occasional episodes introduced time travel, other realms, spirits, supernatural, and and other sci-fi elements to the series- it was all still wrapped around the idea of Cobra and the Joes.

The film marked the end of the "Real American Hero" cartoon series, but a new series developed by DIC would attempt to continue the series in 1989 with a five part series, and then continuing for another 44 episodes in 1990.

The Forever Purge

The Forever Purge dares to ask the question: "What if the Right Wing Extremist Chodes acted just like the Antifa Rioting Dipwads? Your answer is this ham-fisted attempt at a "morality" play. At it's core, it's the same high concept idea that's gone on for probably too long, but this latest film does get a few kudos for bringing out the "Mad Max"-esque aesthetic and filling the runtime with enough blood and violence to make it worthwhile. 

So here we are, four years after the Purge "ended" and the New Founding Fathers have been elected BACK into power and have immediately restarted the annual purge. Seriously an sincerely, I have to sk how this idea ever blossomed- it's such a dumb concept. But that's not what I'm here to talk about- I'm here to talk about THIS movie, the latest in a long series that includes FOUR films and TWO seasons of television programming. So let's get to the plot of this film... 

Two Mexican immigrants have fled the Mexican cartels to the United States where they find gainful employment and wind up experiencing their first Purge. Meanwhile, the husbands' wealthy employer is protecting his own family on the same night, across town. We see a bit of tension between Juan and the eldest son, Dylan. The night is mostly uneventful for both families- and then, when the sirens echo and the Purge is called to a halt- a new group of Racist Anarchistic Lunatics (called the "Ever Afters") decide to enact their own rebellion with the Forever Purge. With this act, the two families are thrust together ad forced to flee to Mexico. Tensions are high as the two families are also forced to face their own racism, their own paranoia, and also learn to trust and rely on one another to survive. 

THE GOOD: Okay, one of the things I actually liked about this film was that we see the "aftermath" of an annual "purge" event. We see the smoked out ruins of homes, businesses, and bodies that litter the streets and the carrion that feast.  It's an eerie thing and might remind some viewers of a zombie film in a few ways. 

THE BAD: It's a whole lot of political nonsense delivered with a ham-fisted approach that dumbs down a great many issues. There are a number of scene chewing performances, but none more ridiculously over the top than a Neo-Nazi with a swastika tattoo on his freaking cheek "identifying" the sounds of various "gunfire" taking place out of sight. It was was just silly and forced.

Mild recommendation if you enjoy the Purge films. There isnt much new here, though having an opportunity to experience the aftermath of one night is actually kind of chilling and further builds the world.

 

"With Teeth" by Brian Keene

 I am a big fan of Brian Keene's work. 

Not going to lie here, as this crazy sonofabitch caught my attention and absolutely shredded my soul with his novel "DarkHollow" (AKA: The Rutting Season). He just continued to shred me with a series of Zombie novels that completely reinvented the genre in a way no film has managed to capture, twisted a coming of age story into horrific discoveries and revelations regarding the cycle of abuse, and introduced a ruthless "hero" willing to do anything to stop the Elder-thing forces that constantly threaten Keene's shared multiverse of horror. 

Now, here's the thing- EVERYONE eventually has to write a vampire story. It's practically a "coming of age" event for horror writers and such. And while I am a fan of Keene's work, I in no way have a full collection of his books and stories at my fingertips. So when I managed to get a little extra money on "Prime" day, I saw that Keene had a fairly new novel out and that it was going to explore some very ravenous vampires in the West Virginia Hills. 

I had to have it. 

And with the opening lines of the novel, I was hooked- my cheek drawn down to the page, ripped by the cold steel of Keene's wordplay. He knows how to turn a phrase, capture the voice of his lead character, and lead the reader through a journey that finds a group of middle-age men taking a trip to a dark hollow deep in the West Virginia woods. 

What stands out about the novel, however- is that Keene captures the very real and compelling reason for their journey. He describes the characters, letting us know about the economic struggles of their families, what is driving each man, and how each character connects to the others. These are all familiar faces that many people have seen in their day to day lives- poor men in dire straights hoping to make a quick buck on a "get rich" scheme. They're all just as hungry as the vampires they're about to encounter, just as desperate, and maybe just as brutal when it comes down to it. 

Keene's novel comes with two additional vampire stories, one of which references the clan of monsters in the West Virginia woods- the other deals with another group of vampires trapped within a watery grave. 

Highly recommended 8/10. I think a part of me wanted the story to go on, but there you go.

Army of the Dead 2021

Zack Snyder's return to basics directing is a fairly "paint by numbers" zombie action film. It takes it's cues more from "Escape from New York" and "Doomsday" rather than George Romero's zombie films,however- a group of ex-military are tasked with the opportunity to make in excess of several million dollars, tax free, if they can raid a Casino Vault the day before the government plans on dropping a nuke atop the zombie infested Las Vegas. When the group get there, they encounter far more than the shambling, mindless hordes that they fought before. 

Snyder's new zombies have developed into an savage and largely barbaric society, complete with a King and Queen to rule over the city of the dead. Communicating with one another through primitive growls, howls, grunts, and screams; the creatures have developed a hierarchical structure between "shamblers" and "Alpha" zombies, the latter of which were all bitten by Patient Zero (AKA: The King). 

Scott Ward (Dave Bautista) leads his rag tag team of ex-military and other criminal sorts into the Zombie City. Tagging along for the ride is his daughter, a volunteer with Las Vegas refugees looking for some of her people who tried to go back inside for that loose cash laying about the city. Their expectations soon go south and it isn't long until the zombies start to converge on our little group of would-be casino robbers. 

The nitty gritty is that this is a lot of gory action fun eye-candy and the social dynamic between the group is pretty good. Tig Notaro puts in an especially caustic performance as a snarky Helicopter Pilot. Dave Bautista is believable as a veteran struggling with the inability to communicate with the people around him due to his own feelings of guilt in having to put down his wife. The growing camaraderie between Dieter (Matthias Schweighöfer) and the philosophical Vanderohe (Omari Hardwick) is often entertaining to watch. Theo Rossi shows up as a despicable refugee camp guard, while Ella Purnell rounds out the cast as Scott's daughter, Kate Ward. 

A satisfying 8 out of 10, though don't expect it to be the "best thing evah!"- it's fun popcorn munching at it's best.

 

Psychoape! (2021)

 In the low to no budget tradition of "Gorilla" film-making, a bunch of film makers set out to follow a vision. Armed with a love for and admiration for the classic monkey horror films of yesteryear, a lot of puns, a bushel of bananas, and some fairly basic digital effects (A lot of splatter effects) the crew put some guy in an ape suit and set out to make a film. It had all the tell-tale signs of being shot on video- poor sound quality mixed with some decent shots, and actors in bad wigs. And with all the heart director Addison Binek could muster up, they set out into the cold cruel world of promoting their film.

Which, oddly, led to me answering a tweet that happened to pop up on my feed with the film makers asking for reviews. They sent me a link and a password- a little more than an hour later, I am back from the jungles with a report. 

I am torn between being highly amused and feeling slightly like the Banana Spinning Sign Guy from the early portion of the film, in which I am also torn between the brilliance of and confusion in choosing to keep much of the footage the crew actually shot for this scene. Admittedly, the most talented performer and hilarious performance comes from the news anchor, played by Grover McCants. Many of the scenes are cut a little oddly, with pacing being a little too brisk at places and then dragging in others. In one scene, the film moves to New York City to follow a pair discussing the ape as they walk through the park. The acting is awful as both performers struggle through dialogue that seems largely improvised on the spot. There are a couple of scenes just like this, including an oddly stretched out argument between two sisters- which seems to stray very far from its original intent. For the record, I agree with the one girl on the rat movie- it's better than the other movie in my book. 

The movie quickly loses steam at around the fifty minute mark as I kept glancing down to check my phone during PsychoApe's trip to New York, which was an inevitable moment given the direction of the film. The puns keep coming and the monkey movie jokes stack up.

3 out of 10, and while not a high recommend I would recommend it for fans of low to no budget studios like Troma and directer Chris Seaver's Mulva: Zombie Ass-kicker series. I got a small kick out of the film, though I also recognize it's not going to be everyone's top banana.