It's been a long time, hasn't it? I'm sure you've missed me... or something along those lines. Anyway, dear Faceless REader... I present you with a walloping 4 reviews. How do you like that?
Prince of Persia
With his awkward smile and traditional good looks, Jake Gyllenhall seems like a natural for the role of swashbuckling hero. After tackling several dramatic roles in off-beat films, the actor’s recent mainstream plunge have elevated his box office appeal and it was only a matter of time before someone found a vehicle to drive his box office stardom to new heights. The video game adaptation of “Prince of Persia” almost seems like a perfect match, giving Jake a chance to shine as the titular character who swashbuckles his way through the sands of a Persian desert and face off against villainous sorceries in an attempt to save the world. Unfortunately, whether due to poor direction or a lack of seriousness on the part of Gyllenhal, the role doesn’t really deliver all that much and Prince Dustan comes off as a vanilla bland with a hint of Monty Pythonesque silliness as he struggles through a faux English accent.
But this is really the only complaint about a film that, in every other way, delivers the goods. The action is quick and intense, with a lot of “parcour”-inspired chase scenes across the roof tops, through the castles, and built into various fight scenes. The special effects, mostly computer generated, were spot on and tried to avoid looking “silly” for the most part. Costumes were excellent! For fans of the “Arabian Nights” style mythology, the film draws strong inspiration from that genre with a melting pot of various cultures trading goods and services in a barren desert fraught with bandits, monsters, magics, and dangers. Finally, the supporting roles are a hodgepodge of classic “myth” characters with a pair of noble thieves, the skillful Princess, weapon-focused assassins, and an evil mastermind whose betrayal cuts to the heart of our hero.
A good popcorn muncher, but not quite the epic I think Disney might have been hoping for.
3.5 out of 5.
Blood Creek
I finally get this one from Netflix after waiting roughly 2 months. This movie has had a lot of buzz, with significant respect from various websites and a level of cult approval that simply demands the film should be seen by genre fans. I’ve been eagerly awaiting the films’ arrival, though a part of me has also been dreading the possibility that it would be another empty promise unfulfilled.
The film opens in 1936, when the German Government sends a researcher to stay with a family of German immigrants on a secluded farm in America. He’s there to examine some old runes the family found carved on several rocks throughout the property, rocks the family used to help build the foundation for their barn. In short order, we find out there’s much more to this researcher than meets the eye and he reveals his ability to return life to the dead. And with that discovery, we are flung forward into the present and are introduced to a paramedic whose life has somehow been flung out of control. His “War Hero” brother has been missing for two years after a fishing trip to a nearby lake. This young man has shouldered the burden of blame, from himself, his sickly father, and his brothers’ family. He tries to make up for the loss, taking care of his father, his brothers’ wife and children, all while living in a ramshackle camper just outside his family home. He wakes up to a hand on his mouth to find his brother standing above his bed; “Get your gear, some guns and ammunition, and grab the boat…don’t wake up dad. We have work to do.”
That’s how the movie starts… and what has happened over the course of two years is delivered in the course of the next day’s events as both brothers return to the farm house from the start of the film. The family hasn’t aged much and things have been very bad for a very long time. I don’t want to give away much more, because it might enter spoiler territory and you don’t want to know what’s going to happen when things start going down… the pacing of this bad boy keeps you on the edge of your seat with spectacular gore effects upping the ante. The films villain, the monster, is poorly described as a vampire in several reviews… this poor definition ill prepares you for the thing that haunts this farm. This is a traditional Necromancer, a sorcerer whose talents lay with raising and controlling the dead. But event that definition would ill prepare you for the thing and the horrors he unleashes throughout the course of the night.
5 out of 5.
The Descent: Part Two
The Descent part Two picks up shortly after the end of the original film, with Sarah managing to make her way to the surface as a rescue operation is already in affect to rescue her friends. We find out that Juno is the daughter of a State Senator and the county Sheriff is a little overeager. Unable to remember the past several days, Sarah is forced to accompany the small rescue operation back into the caves where they once again come face to face with the snaggle-toothed beasties from the first film. Less focused on the characters this time around, The Descent Part Two still manages to pack a bit of a punch and there’s no shortage of the sticky red stuff as survivors fight back against their ripping, tearing, rending attackers.
There isn’t a lot to be said about the film. It’s good, it follows up on a decent story, and it delivers on the gory guts. This is pretty much a follow-up film that doesn’t do much on it’s own and does absolutely nothing for the first films’ storyline. Everything that needed to be said or done was done so by the climax of the first film. It also doesn’t really stand on it’s own as we’re forced to care, yet again, about the same two characters we had grown to enjoy in the first film. The other characters are fairly two dimensional caricatures of what they represent. All of this with an ending that comes from right out of the blue, and you have what you have… a decent popcorn muncher flick, although fairly well done.
4 out of 5.
Tokyo Zombie:
Hello? My name is Mark. I’ve been watching Zombie movies since the age of around 9 or 10, each film experience building on the next and the next with a constant craving for more. I never seem to fill the void; I never seem to find satisfaction. And so it was with an unholy thirst that I clicked on this selection from Streaming Netflix and sat back to watch what would wind up being one of the oddest bits of zombie cinema. I offer humble thanks to the gawds of zombiedom that this piece of awesomeness actually exists and that someone was goof-nut insane enough to write this script.
Two factory workers, both idiots, living in the shadow of a large volcano accidentally kill their direct supervisor after he catches them practicing jiujitsu on company time. They bury him on the Volcano, where everyone goes to drop their trash and bury various bodies. The dead rise, they infest all of Tokyo, and then the two factory workers use their jiujitsu skills to try and survive. After meeting and rescuing a young woman in distress, their partnership comes to an end when the elder statesman of the two becomes bitten and decides to leave before he turns. Five years later and Fujio is now married to the woman, with a young daughter, and he survives as a professional Zombie fighter in the middle of Tokyo where the rich entertain themselves by making the poor fight zombies in a pit. Look, this movie I insane and I can’t really do it justice… now it’s not a perfect movie, either. But it’s awkward and often flat out stupid, but that’s really the point of the film… it’s just utterly insane.
4 out of 5.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Iron Man 2 review.
It's not often that I sit here and find myself at a loss for words to describe a movie experience. Iron Man 2 kicks off on the right beat, delivering the exposed Tony Stark to a world that simply waits to devour all he has to offer. He's forced to contend not only with a restylized Crimson Dynamo played by Mickey Rourke, but he's also forced into far more dynamic struggles with the encroachment of a demanding U.S. Government and predatory Corporate competition in the form of "Hammer" industries. The pressure of these struggles take second stage, however, as Stark struggles with the very technology that once saved his life and is now slowly killing him. There's simply so much happening in this movie that several aspects seem lost in the shuffle, and yet there's a brilliant delivery from Favreau's direction and pacing while Downey's portrayal of Stark is never anything less than brilliant. So I'm at a loss for where to begin, where to end, and what to talk about in between all of that junk.
I think the whole thing can be summed up with the performance from Robert Downey, who so totally owns the screen at any given time. Stark is a likeable hero with a dark side... an egomaniac and a genius, he has no trouble at all with burying his insecurities beneath a thick layer of snark and then drowning that layer beneath severe alcohol abuse. Yes, Tony Stark is an alcoholic... he downs casual drinks throughout the course of the film, he becomes dangerously intoxicated at one point, and continues to seek solace at the bottom of the bottle as he comes closer to death. His acoholism is hereditary as we see his father also drown his own worries in the bottle, guzzling drinks in the outtakes from a commercial performance introducing his newest inventions. Uncomfortable with people and social interaction, Stark doesn't just put on a suit to fight crime and police the world... he hides behind the Iron Man persona and he hopes no one sees how fragile his whole world really is. But it's when he becomes lost in technology, displaying his odd understanding and obsession for the science that created his persona, that he no longer needs to dive in a bottle or hide behind the persona of a "super hero".
The only failing in this film seems to be with it's primary combat villain, with Mickey Rourkes' performance of the Crimson Dynamo as little more than a scientifically minded thug. His character is never truly explored in any further depth than to present him as an aggressive foil to the far superior performance from Sam Rockwell. Rockwell portrays "Hammer", Starks corporate rival in the arms technology business. He's a cowardly, manipulative, conniving little trend follower lost in the shadow of Starks' superior knowledge and ability. He's basically the money behind better ideas, hoping that he can take credit for someone elses' work. The two villains play off eachother well for some laughs, but Rourke comes off as cold and flawless and ultimately unreachable. The audience can actually somewhat identify with Rockwell, and his villain is the far superior despite a lack of rockets and murderous intent.
Most surprisingly, at least to me, is this film's political tone. It seems to purposefully go against the grain with a positive image of capitalism, going so far as to make some negative comments regarding the "Liberal Agenda" and promoting a very Libertarian world view from it's lead character. So while this film has action, drama, and an intense build to a brilliant transformation with it's lead character, it also carries some unique views in a market often dominated by the left leaning belief structure of the Hollywood elite.
5 out of 5.
I think the whole thing can be summed up with the performance from Robert Downey, who so totally owns the screen at any given time. Stark is a likeable hero with a dark side... an egomaniac and a genius, he has no trouble at all with burying his insecurities beneath a thick layer of snark and then drowning that layer beneath severe alcohol abuse. Yes, Tony Stark is an alcoholic... he downs casual drinks throughout the course of the film, he becomes dangerously intoxicated at one point, and continues to seek solace at the bottom of the bottle as he comes closer to death. His acoholism is hereditary as we see his father also drown his own worries in the bottle, guzzling drinks in the outtakes from a commercial performance introducing his newest inventions. Uncomfortable with people and social interaction, Stark doesn't just put on a suit to fight crime and police the world... he hides behind the Iron Man persona and he hopes no one sees how fragile his whole world really is. But it's when he becomes lost in technology, displaying his odd understanding and obsession for the science that created his persona, that he no longer needs to dive in a bottle or hide behind the persona of a "super hero".
The only failing in this film seems to be with it's primary combat villain, with Mickey Rourkes' performance of the Crimson Dynamo as little more than a scientifically minded thug. His character is never truly explored in any further depth than to present him as an aggressive foil to the far superior performance from Sam Rockwell. Rockwell portrays "Hammer", Starks corporate rival in the arms technology business. He's a cowardly, manipulative, conniving little trend follower lost in the shadow of Starks' superior knowledge and ability. He's basically the money behind better ideas, hoping that he can take credit for someone elses' work. The two villains play off eachother well for some laughs, but Rourke comes off as cold and flawless and ultimately unreachable. The audience can actually somewhat identify with Rockwell, and his villain is the far superior despite a lack of rockets and murderous intent.
Most surprisingly, at least to me, is this film's political tone. It seems to purposefully go against the grain with a positive image of capitalism, going so far as to make some negative comments regarding the "Liberal Agenda" and promoting a very Libertarian world view from it's lead character. So while this film has action, drama, and an intense build to a brilliant transformation with it's lead character, it also carries some unique views in a market often dominated by the left leaning belief structure of the Hollywood elite.
5 out of 5.
Monday, May 3, 2010
A Nightmare On Elm Street review + Wandering Ginsa Butterfly II
Nightmare on Elm Street (re-imagining)
Jackie Earle Haley reinvents the role of “Freddy Krueger” with his performance in the new “re-imagining” of “A Nightmare on Elm Street” released by Platinum Dunes this past weekend. His performance is angry and loathsome, a creepy little phantom stalking his victims in a place where and when they are most vulnerable. We see him as the monster, but we also see him as a man before his death. We see him beg and plead for his life as he is killed by the neighborhood parents, we see him interact with the children who would become his victims, and all of these ideas tend to work as an exploration of who Freddy Krueger is and why. Haley plays with the part, diddling his razor fingers with the threat of a rattlesnake waiting to strike… he taunts the teen cast, blaming them for his painful demise. He stalks them, playfully reminding them of a past they can barely comprehend or even remember. Simply put, JEH is fantastic as Freddy.
But, as good as Haley is, he can’t carry the entirety of the film on his own shoulders. For all his work, the rest of the cast are caught within a melodramatic loop of crying, screaming, neurotic scenes designed to seem “dark” but come off as comedic. The amped up performances never level off. From beginning to end, the cast come off as cardboard cut outs of virtually every teen victim we tend to see in traditional slasher films. Within the first three minutes of the film, we’re introduced to the whole cast… shy, quiet, responsible, and artistic Nancy combining several aspects of the traditional series’ three leading “Survivor Girls” , beautiful and popular Kris replaces Tina and virtually every other “best friend” victim girl in the prior series, angry Jesse is the ex-boyfriend who slams money on the counter and teases his best friend about his infatuation with the leading lady, Quentin is the aforementioned “best friend” who is also the Principals’ “rebellious” son and hyperactive teenage boy who wears an emo-band tee-shirt throughout the whole film (you’d think he’d change it after a shower or something, but nah), and then there’s Dean… muscular, tall, handsome, and as cardboard cut-out as it gets. Moms and Dads pop up, teachers drone on through several lectures, and other victims are variously tracked down to one of the most ludicrous scenes of the movie. (Who clicked on the “Upload” button???)
The story comes off as a barely cobbled together mess that takes its audience for granted and gives them what a studio would think the fans want. They offer gory death scenes, odd dream sequence visual effects, amped up teens in a panic, and plenty of “jump scares” timed with the consistency of Big Ben. They don’t waste time explaining or wondering precisely how this scumbag could come back in dreams or why he wears a razor glove, but they make certain to spell out effects of certain drugs and what the risks are for staying awake too long. And while I’m certain they thought it made the film “darker”, the long term affect of having your cast amped up with the screams, fear, and weeping is that you start to laugh at them and their emotional stupidity. I was so busy laughing that the emotional revelations that COULD have turned the film into a masterpiece were wasted on an audience that simply wouldn’t be able to feel any sort of impact due to the emotional numbing of the rest of the film.
Closing out, Nightmare was a fun little popcorn venture that never lives up to the original films’ emotional scarring. It’s a series of missteps with some good sequences and one performance that stands head, waist, and shoulders above the rest. Platinum Dunes and Michael Bay will probably continue to rake through the dust of the late 80’s and early 90’s in order to provide additional remakes, “reimaginings”, and retreads of films that have been far more effective with their original incarnation. It’s a proven money-making formula for them and I don’t begrudge anyone’s desire to make a buck, so there are tons of festival films and direct to dvd alternatives introducing young film makers to an audience that’s greedy for a new blend in horror. I don’t feel ripped off, but I do feel badly for Haley and the rest of the young cast who will probably be forced to shoulder the responsibility for Nightmare’s lack of a cult following in the coming years.
3 out of 5.
Wondering Ginsa Butterfly 2.
I managed to catch the second Wandering Ginsa Butterfly film, but feel a little cheated since I hadn’t seen the first. Meiko Kaji stars as the Butterfly, Nami… a wandering gambler and swordswoman of some merit. She dresses to the hilt in traditional robes and a kimono, but the film is set in the modern era (early ‘70’s) and features an early role for Martial Arts hero Sonny Chiba. The two actors ally to take on a corrupt business man and his Yakuza Goons in a tale of bloody vengeance and furious action. It’s always a pleasure to watch Ms. Kaji, her eyes are so expressive and she always does something special with her characters. Her and Chiba have great chemistry and humor together, and I’m looking forward to more of the WGB film series, but this isn’t really the best introduction to Meiko Kaji and for that I recommend her Female Scorpion series or Lady Snowblood.
3.5 out of 5.
Jackie Earle Haley reinvents the role of “Freddy Krueger” with his performance in the new “re-imagining” of “A Nightmare on Elm Street” released by Platinum Dunes this past weekend. His performance is angry and loathsome, a creepy little phantom stalking his victims in a place where and when they are most vulnerable. We see him as the monster, but we also see him as a man before his death. We see him beg and plead for his life as he is killed by the neighborhood parents, we see him interact with the children who would become his victims, and all of these ideas tend to work as an exploration of who Freddy Krueger is and why. Haley plays with the part, diddling his razor fingers with the threat of a rattlesnake waiting to strike… he taunts the teen cast, blaming them for his painful demise. He stalks them, playfully reminding them of a past they can barely comprehend or even remember. Simply put, JEH is fantastic as Freddy.
But, as good as Haley is, he can’t carry the entirety of the film on his own shoulders. For all his work, the rest of the cast are caught within a melodramatic loop of crying, screaming, neurotic scenes designed to seem “dark” but come off as comedic. The amped up performances never level off. From beginning to end, the cast come off as cardboard cut outs of virtually every teen victim we tend to see in traditional slasher films. Within the first three minutes of the film, we’re introduced to the whole cast… shy, quiet, responsible, and artistic Nancy combining several aspects of the traditional series’ three leading “Survivor Girls” , beautiful and popular Kris replaces Tina and virtually every other “best friend” victim girl in the prior series, angry Jesse is the ex-boyfriend who slams money on the counter and teases his best friend about his infatuation with the leading lady, Quentin is the aforementioned “best friend” who is also the Principals’ “rebellious” son and hyperactive teenage boy who wears an emo-band tee-shirt throughout the whole film (you’d think he’d change it after a shower or something, but nah), and then there’s Dean… muscular, tall, handsome, and as cardboard cut-out as it gets. Moms and Dads pop up, teachers drone on through several lectures, and other victims are variously tracked down to one of the most ludicrous scenes of the movie. (Who clicked on the “Upload” button???)
The story comes off as a barely cobbled together mess that takes its audience for granted and gives them what a studio would think the fans want. They offer gory death scenes, odd dream sequence visual effects, amped up teens in a panic, and plenty of “jump scares” timed with the consistency of Big Ben. They don’t waste time explaining or wondering precisely how this scumbag could come back in dreams or why he wears a razor glove, but they make certain to spell out effects of certain drugs and what the risks are for staying awake too long. And while I’m certain they thought it made the film “darker”, the long term affect of having your cast amped up with the screams, fear, and weeping is that you start to laugh at them and their emotional stupidity. I was so busy laughing that the emotional revelations that COULD have turned the film into a masterpiece were wasted on an audience that simply wouldn’t be able to feel any sort of impact due to the emotional numbing of the rest of the film.
Closing out, Nightmare was a fun little popcorn venture that never lives up to the original films’ emotional scarring. It’s a series of missteps with some good sequences and one performance that stands head, waist, and shoulders above the rest. Platinum Dunes and Michael Bay will probably continue to rake through the dust of the late 80’s and early 90’s in order to provide additional remakes, “reimaginings”, and retreads of films that have been far more effective with their original incarnation. It’s a proven money-making formula for them and I don’t begrudge anyone’s desire to make a buck, so there are tons of festival films and direct to dvd alternatives introducing young film makers to an audience that’s greedy for a new blend in horror. I don’t feel ripped off, but I do feel badly for Haley and the rest of the young cast who will probably be forced to shoulder the responsibility for Nightmare’s lack of a cult following in the coming years.
3 out of 5.
Wondering Ginsa Butterfly 2.
I managed to catch the second Wandering Ginsa Butterfly film, but feel a little cheated since I hadn’t seen the first. Meiko Kaji stars as the Butterfly, Nami… a wandering gambler and swordswoman of some merit. She dresses to the hilt in traditional robes and a kimono, but the film is set in the modern era (early ‘70’s) and features an early role for Martial Arts hero Sonny Chiba. The two actors ally to take on a corrupt business man and his Yakuza Goons in a tale of bloody vengeance and furious action. It’s always a pleasure to watch Ms. Kaji, her eyes are so expressive and she always does something special with her characters. Her and Chiba have great chemistry and humor together, and I’m looking forward to more of the WGB film series, but this isn’t really the best introduction to Meiko Kaji and for that I recommend her Female Scorpion series or Lady Snowblood.
3.5 out of 5.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
A slow month, but one GREAT movie with two "eh" reviews.
It’s been a fairly slow month with regards to my usual gluttony of films. I’ve lacked significant time to just lay back and watch some good movies, and Netflix seems to have misplaced my top ten choices for the past month and a half so I’m mostly getting movies that I only sort of want to watch. I just don’t have the energy, at the end of the day, to stay up late and watch a couple of flicks in a row.. I’ve been falling asleep to Caillou, Kipper the Dog, and various other “Sprout” shows for the past three weeks with my son and that leaves out a lot of zombie smashing goodness that I might normally lounge back to watch. I have to wait for my four year old to fall asleep before I even think about throwing on a fright flick, and the Samurai films can get fairly risqué as well. Ah well… so goes the life of a family man, I suppose.
But I am the Mad Mark and I do watch a lot of crap, so here go my reviews for the week. From Victorian horror to grindhouse chambara, the Mad Mark runs the gauntlet and flips a few hours from the clock.
I Sell The Dead:
This beautifully macabre film recounts the adventures of two grave robbers sentenced to the Guillotine in some unspecified time before modern technology. Apprenticed at a young age, Dominic Monahan headlines the film as he learns the tricks of the trade and sparks a lifelong friendship with his partner, whom we see beheaded in the opening moments of the film. Convicted of grave-robbing and murder, the young man recounts his life story to a curious monk played by Ron Perlman; a life story that includes grave robbing, thieving the body of a relative, blackmail from an insidious doctor, and an eventual series of confrontations with the blatantly supernatural. The stories are delivered with a morbid humor and self deprecation, endearing us to the decidedly un-wholesome duo around which the film revolves. Both men lack courage, decency, tact, and reasonable sense. But they have a fondness for one another that is very brotherly, occasionally even paternal as the older man continues to look after his young charge.
We have vampires, zombies, ghouls, violent criminals, some “otherworldly” threats and experiences wrapped in the context of what is wholly a satisfying romp. Monahan is fantastic in his flippant manner and total disregard for social niceties. Though Perlman only plays a small role, his characters’ transformation allows the story to propel itself toward a climactic conclusion that wraps many loose ends and builds to a satisfying twist that may seem a little too obvious at times. And that’s really where the only problem with this film lies… there are a few welcome surprises, but the film becomes largely predictable and you see several twists coming before the characters start to turn the corner. At times, this becomes amusing as you can see the set up for a good number of punch lines but the characters come off as woefully inept and dense. This actually feeds into the humor at several points, but a less accepting audience might find the film a little too cliché for their own tastes. I loved it, though.
4 out of 5.
Quick Draw Okatsu
Slashing a bloody path of vengeance, Quick Draw Okatsu is typical chambara fanfare with corrupt officials forced to come eye to eye with the deadly blade of a former victim. Okatsu is the adopted daughter of a Samurai sword instructor, her father’s greatest pupil and the towns’ local beauty. When her brother shirks his duty and decides to run off with his commoner girlfriend, Okatsu attempts to atone for his numerous mistakes when he’s tricked into losing money at the local gambling house. Her brother is killed, his pregnant girlfriend sold to a brothel, her father betrayed and murdered by a former student, and all of these events orchestrated by a corrupt official who also brutally takes her virtue… someone done messed up, and Okatsu is going to deliver the whoopings to the left and too the right with a few dozen slashes from her deadly blade.
3.5 out of 5.
But I am the Mad Mark and I do watch a lot of crap, so here go my reviews for the week. From Victorian horror to grindhouse chambara, the Mad Mark runs the gauntlet and flips a few hours from the clock.
I Sell The Dead:
This beautifully macabre film recounts the adventures of two grave robbers sentenced to the Guillotine in some unspecified time before modern technology. Apprenticed at a young age, Dominic Monahan headlines the film as he learns the tricks of the trade and sparks a lifelong friendship with his partner, whom we see beheaded in the opening moments of the film. Convicted of grave-robbing and murder, the young man recounts his life story to a curious monk played by Ron Perlman; a life story that includes grave robbing, thieving the body of a relative, blackmail from an insidious doctor, and an eventual series of confrontations with the blatantly supernatural. The stories are delivered with a morbid humor and self deprecation, endearing us to the decidedly un-wholesome duo around which the film revolves. Both men lack courage, decency, tact, and reasonable sense. But they have a fondness for one another that is very brotherly, occasionally even paternal as the older man continues to look after his young charge.
We have vampires, zombies, ghouls, violent criminals, some “otherworldly” threats and experiences wrapped in the context of what is wholly a satisfying romp. Monahan is fantastic in his flippant manner and total disregard for social niceties. Though Perlman only plays a small role, his characters’ transformation allows the story to propel itself toward a climactic conclusion that wraps many loose ends and builds to a satisfying twist that may seem a little too obvious at times. And that’s really where the only problem with this film lies… there are a few welcome surprises, but the film becomes largely predictable and you see several twists coming before the characters start to turn the corner. At times, this becomes amusing as you can see the set up for a good number of punch lines but the characters come off as woefully inept and dense. This actually feeds into the humor at several points, but a less accepting audience might find the film a little too cliché for their own tastes. I loved it, though.
4 out of 5.
Quick Draw Okatsu
Slashing a bloody path of vengeance, Quick Draw Okatsu is typical chambara fanfare with corrupt officials forced to come eye to eye with the deadly blade of a former victim. Okatsu is the adopted daughter of a Samurai sword instructor, her father’s greatest pupil and the towns’ local beauty. When her brother shirks his duty and decides to run off with his commoner girlfriend, Okatsu attempts to atone for his numerous mistakes when he’s tricked into losing money at the local gambling house. Her brother is killed, his pregnant girlfriend sold to a brothel, her father betrayed and murdered by a former student, and all of these events orchestrated by a corrupt official who also brutally takes her virtue… someone done messed up, and Okatsu is going to deliver the whoopings to the left and too the right with a few dozen slashes from her deadly blade.
3.5 out of 5.
Monday, April 12, 2010
4 Reviews at the redcap's Blog!
How to Train Your Dragon
After finally managing to wrangle my son into the van, my wife and I managed to catch a Sunday afternoon screening of the latest 3-D Animated film for kids. Because the Pup doesn’t like to wear the glasses and my wife gets dizzy, we only managed to catch the film in regular 2-D and I sat back with a little package of nachos in order to avoid the stomach tearing effects of the popcorn my son regularly purchases for these little flicks. This is your fairly standard little “coming of age” story set to a Viking background and featuring a beautiful display of animated dragons. It was a satisfying afternoon film, something I’d probably wind up buying for both my wife and son to catch on a lazy evening at home but I’m not sure where else I could take the review.
Honestly, it’s not a bad film and I had a lot of fun watching it. But it was pretty much a “paint by numbers” story that didn’t try too hard to be much more than what it was, though the animation was absolutely top of the line and the action sequences were extremely well conceived. There were a number of moralizing points the story tried to make, and it pretty much succeeded on all counts without being too preachy or offensively condescending. There are worse ways to spend an afternoon.
4 out of 5.
The Graves:
Two sisters on a “last hurrah” road trip make a wrong turn and wind up in your typical Midwest bible-thumping “crazy” town with lunatic locals and homicidal maniacs. In what started off with some promising moments from one of the “eight movies to die for”, The Graves delivers some early gore and a terrific performance from Bill Moseley in order to fall through on the last two acts in a disappointing reach extra padded time. Our protagonist sisters are chased, tortured, and run to ground by a number of somewhat colorful characters in an attempt to appease the demonic ghosts that reside within the abandoned mine that once fueled the lifeblood of the small town. In developing a mystery and a number of characters, the film ultimately fails to give us any real answers to the number of questions that pop up. Moseley delivers a line that may have been seen as profound when it was written, but within the context of the film it ultimately gives you the gist of what ultimately fails…. He explains that there is no reason, but the entire film works to show us that there is but never stops to tell us what that reason is.
It could have something to do with the hanged miners accused of demonic possession, the insanity of the mines’ founder, the skull buried atop the gold that kicked off the rush that built the town, the flies that buzz around, the insane spirits, demonic forces, or too much chlorine in the water for all we need to know. I don’t know why she swallowed a fly, but I guess she’ll die. What we do know is that whatever “force” inspires the town to commit their bloody deeds sucks out eyeballs and makes a horrific screaming sound when it feeds. You would think at least one nut job would cave and give us a long monologue in answer to the sisters’ continuous questions, if not just to shut them up… but alas! Bubkus!
3 out of 5.
Shadow Hunters
“Moonlight”, “Daylight”, and Jubei are three ronin Samurai who sell their swords for the sole purpose of foiling Ninja schemes and protecting the Clans from the confiscatory practices of a corrupt Shogunate. When a distant mountain family is threatened by the “Shadows” (ninja operatives for the Shogunate), the three swordsmen ride in and deliver sword slinging justice in bloody geysers of furious vengeance! They are tasked with accompanying a Clan Samurai as he presents a document bearing the Shoguns’ seal that guarantees possession of the fiefdom to the mountain family. The tale of each Ronin unfolds throughout their journey, so we understand precisely why they hunt the shadows and why they’ve accepted their station in the order of things as lowly “wavemen.”
Another furious chambara release from the folks over at AnimEigo, Shadow Hunters is a fairly standard sword epic with colorful characters and fantastic martial arts. Look, I just really love these movies… they might not be for everyone. There are a ton of other films who take the same cues and similar action sequences, from the Lone wolf & Cub series to Zatoichi. Shadow Hunters ranks up there with some of the best, and I look forward to watching additional films in the series. The DVD is packaged pretty nicely with some additional liner notes in the subtitles, including explanations on some of the terminology and historical annotations for events at the time. We also get a few trailers for additional AnimeIgo “samurai cinema” releases.
4 out of 5.
Shadow Hunters II: Echoes of Destiny
The second installment of the Shadow Hunters series delivers much the same action as the first film. Swords slash, blood sprays, and the ninja flip and fly around the screen as the Samurai cut them down and send their souls to jigoku. We continue shortly after the last film left off, with the Shadows demanding seppuku for the failure of their first lord to succeed in his duty and destroy the Hunters. A new Shadow is placed in charge, and he tasks the female Ninja with tracking down the Hunters and we’re treated to a number of scenes with the Shadow Hunters fending off attacking ninja. They are then summoned to a beleaguered province threatened by the political machinations of the shogunate and their Shadow spies. In this convoluted plot, the Wavemen are basically tasked with protecting the delivery of a canon to fief of a Clan honored with the task of protecting it.
I’ll take this moment to give you a spoiler warning as I discuss a fundamental truth about the nature of Samurai Chambara films. There is rarely ever a happy ending… in point of fact, the “heroes” usually succeed in their task; kill all the bad guys, deliver the goods, and kiss all the girls. But things are often worse off than when they started and the price they paid in order to achieve their aims becomes a terrible burden that they are forced to carry the rest of their lives. When they talk about their miserable lot in life and their haunted steps, you understand precisely what they mean by the end of the film as innocents suffer, people die, and honor is lost to various betrayals and political machinations. There is a cursed misery that continues to haunt the characters for the rest of their days and there is almost always a form of seppuku performed in the course of the film, a reminder that even this honorable release is denied to men such as our main characters. Considering how prone I am to depression, I’m not entirely certain why I love these movies so much… but I do.
4 out of 5.
Frightmare
I swear I caught this film at some point in the 80’s, but completely forgot anything at all related to the story or any scene involved. This is an almost entirely uninspired rehash of several plot points found in “Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things” when an aging actor passes away and his body is stolen from his gimmicked death trap of a mausoleum. There is very little to set this film apart from the hundreds of mind-numbing low budget horror releases at the time, and yet Frightmare must have had something going for it because I had not once considered throwing my remote control through the screen. In point of fact, my wife actually found she was somewhat engaged by the films primary antagonist and kept tuning in from her WoW game to take a gander.
3 out of 5, worth watching.
After finally managing to wrangle my son into the van, my wife and I managed to catch a Sunday afternoon screening of the latest 3-D Animated film for kids. Because the Pup doesn’t like to wear the glasses and my wife gets dizzy, we only managed to catch the film in regular 2-D and I sat back with a little package of nachos in order to avoid the stomach tearing effects of the popcorn my son regularly purchases for these little flicks. This is your fairly standard little “coming of age” story set to a Viking background and featuring a beautiful display of animated dragons. It was a satisfying afternoon film, something I’d probably wind up buying for both my wife and son to catch on a lazy evening at home but I’m not sure where else I could take the review.
Honestly, it’s not a bad film and I had a lot of fun watching it. But it was pretty much a “paint by numbers” story that didn’t try too hard to be much more than what it was, though the animation was absolutely top of the line and the action sequences were extremely well conceived. There were a number of moralizing points the story tried to make, and it pretty much succeeded on all counts without being too preachy or offensively condescending. There are worse ways to spend an afternoon.
4 out of 5.
The Graves:
Two sisters on a “last hurrah” road trip make a wrong turn and wind up in your typical Midwest bible-thumping “crazy” town with lunatic locals and homicidal maniacs. In what started off with some promising moments from one of the “eight movies to die for”, The Graves delivers some early gore and a terrific performance from Bill Moseley in order to fall through on the last two acts in a disappointing reach extra padded time. Our protagonist sisters are chased, tortured, and run to ground by a number of somewhat colorful characters in an attempt to appease the demonic ghosts that reside within the abandoned mine that once fueled the lifeblood of the small town. In developing a mystery and a number of characters, the film ultimately fails to give us any real answers to the number of questions that pop up. Moseley delivers a line that may have been seen as profound when it was written, but within the context of the film it ultimately gives you the gist of what ultimately fails…. He explains that there is no reason, but the entire film works to show us that there is but never stops to tell us what that reason is.
It could have something to do with the hanged miners accused of demonic possession, the insanity of the mines’ founder, the skull buried atop the gold that kicked off the rush that built the town, the flies that buzz around, the insane spirits, demonic forces, or too much chlorine in the water for all we need to know. I don’t know why she swallowed a fly, but I guess she’ll die. What we do know is that whatever “force” inspires the town to commit their bloody deeds sucks out eyeballs and makes a horrific screaming sound when it feeds. You would think at least one nut job would cave and give us a long monologue in answer to the sisters’ continuous questions, if not just to shut them up… but alas! Bubkus!
3 out of 5.
Shadow Hunters
“Moonlight”, “Daylight”, and Jubei are three ronin Samurai who sell their swords for the sole purpose of foiling Ninja schemes and protecting the Clans from the confiscatory practices of a corrupt Shogunate. When a distant mountain family is threatened by the “Shadows” (ninja operatives for the Shogunate), the three swordsmen ride in and deliver sword slinging justice in bloody geysers of furious vengeance! They are tasked with accompanying a Clan Samurai as he presents a document bearing the Shoguns’ seal that guarantees possession of the fiefdom to the mountain family. The tale of each Ronin unfolds throughout their journey, so we understand precisely why they hunt the shadows and why they’ve accepted their station in the order of things as lowly “wavemen.”
Another furious chambara release from the folks over at AnimEigo, Shadow Hunters is a fairly standard sword epic with colorful characters and fantastic martial arts. Look, I just really love these movies… they might not be for everyone. There are a ton of other films who take the same cues and similar action sequences, from the Lone wolf & Cub series to Zatoichi. Shadow Hunters ranks up there with some of the best, and I look forward to watching additional films in the series. The DVD is packaged pretty nicely with some additional liner notes in the subtitles, including explanations on some of the terminology and historical annotations for events at the time. We also get a few trailers for additional AnimeIgo “samurai cinema” releases.
4 out of 5.
Shadow Hunters II: Echoes of Destiny
The second installment of the Shadow Hunters series delivers much the same action as the first film. Swords slash, blood sprays, and the ninja flip and fly around the screen as the Samurai cut them down and send their souls to jigoku. We continue shortly after the last film left off, with the Shadows demanding seppuku for the failure of their first lord to succeed in his duty and destroy the Hunters. A new Shadow is placed in charge, and he tasks the female Ninja with tracking down the Hunters and we’re treated to a number of scenes with the Shadow Hunters fending off attacking ninja. They are then summoned to a beleaguered province threatened by the political machinations of the shogunate and their Shadow spies. In this convoluted plot, the Wavemen are basically tasked with protecting the delivery of a canon to fief of a Clan honored with the task of protecting it.
I’ll take this moment to give you a spoiler warning as I discuss a fundamental truth about the nature of Samurai Chambara films. There is rarely ever a happy ending… in point of fact, the “heroes” usually succeed in their task; kill all the bad guys, deliver the goods, and kiss all the girls. But things are often worse off than when they started and the price they paid in order to achieve their aims becomes a terrible burden that they are forced to carry the rest of their lives. When they talk about their miserable lot in life and their haunted steps, you understand precisely what they mean by the end of the film as innocents suffer, people die, and honor is lost to various betrayals and political machinations. There is a cursed misery that continues to haunt the characters for the rest of their days and there is almost always a form of seppuku performed in the course of the film, a reminder that even this honorable release is denied to men such as our main characters. Considering how prone I am to depression, I’m not entirely certain why I love these movies so much… but I do.
4 out of 5.
Frightmare
I swear I caught this film at some point in the 80’s, but completely forgot anything at all related to the story or any scene involved. This is an almost entirely uninspired rehash of several plot points found in “Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things” when an aging actor passes away and his body is stolen from his gimmicked death trap of a mausoleum. There is very little to set this film apart from the hundreds of mind-numbing low budget horror releases at the time, and yet Frightmare must have had something going for it because I had not once considered throwing my remote control through the screen. In point of fact, my wife actually found she was somewhat engaged by the films primary antagonist and kept tuning in from her WoW game to take a gander.
3 out of 5, worth watching.
Monday, April 5, 2010
4 Reviews: Clash of the Titans, 1408, Zombies of Mass Destruction AND... Atropia???
Clash of the Titans (remake)
Sam Worthington headlines Clash of the Titans, a remake of the original 80’s fantasy feature that many people consider a classic in the genre. It’s a theatrical adaptation of Greek Mythology and the story of Perseus, a son of Zeus. Using several gifts from the gods, the young man sets out to slay the Gorgon Medusa and win the hand of Andromeda. The original took several liberties with the story, but yet managed to keep hold to several key factors in the myth. For those of you curious, I suggest you use this wonderful on-line medium to Wikepedia the mythology or do some research of your own… it would probably be far more research than the writers of the “remake” script ever attempted. The story is only marginally similar to the Mythology and then only somewhat less disjointed from the original film. Worthington is quickly proving himself as a magnetic leading man for action films, but much of the film tends to rely more on the Captain of the Guard in order to supply us with an identifiable character while the story continues to introduce a variety of characters who lend their support to Perseus.
The film moves at an exciting pace and tells a good story about a young man coming to grips with his dual nature and the legacy of his bloodline. He has no wish to be a hero or a son of Zeus, preferring the solace of a simple life as a fisherman. Unfortunately, the gods are upset with the world of man because they are no longer worshipped and adored, while the world of men have grown resentful of the power and prestige of the Gods. Events spiral out of his control, and Perseus is forced to take up a mantle in order to defend the city of Joppa from the ravages of the Kraken. Alternatively, the Princess Andromeda may also sacrifice herself to the beast in order to spare her city and her people. These events are being masterminded by Hades, whose desires are fueled by revenge against his brother Zeus for trapping him within the damned earth and presiding over the dead souls that enter Tartarus. Look, I’m trying to keep with the topic at hand and discuss the story but it leaps and flips from one point to another at various stages with the introduction of several characters and the rise of one threat after another. Kalibos emerges as a pawn for Hades, given a glutton of powers to stand in the way of Perseus, and yappity yapyapyap… I think you get the point.
In many places, the film manages to entertain and excite with a number of battle scenes and several monsters that crash and bang across the screen. Perseus’ battle with the giant Scorpions is the stuff of fantastic movie making, with a number of terrific stunts and creeping tensions as the creatures rise from the sands of a strange desert. His confrontation of the three fate witches leaves no room for complaint. His battle with the Kraken itself is absolutely fantastic, with an additional obstacle of three harpies who attempt to steal the Medusa’s head from our hero before he can complete his task. The threat of the gods is ever present in the form of an obsessive street preacher whose devotion to Hades is only matched by his addiction to crack as he screams and blubbers his way from one scene to the next. Unlike the original film, we are also given time to build a relationship with those who travel alongside Perseus so that their various sacrifices hold deeper meaning when they take place. The film is, ultimately, a very good adventure film with some good acting and a decent amount of direction.
Where the film goes wrong, however… it REALLY goes wrong. In what I can only assume was another “robot Spider” moment in production meetings, Perseus is joined in his quest by one of the Djinn… ancient sorcerers bound and imprisoned by Solomon in the Old Testament with a fair amount of mythology surrounding their existence to begin with. Nowhere in the Myth of Perseus, but someone really REALLY wanted to film some Djinn and I suppose this is the movie where they managed to get their keen idea thrown in. Another epic failure was in execution of the quest through Medusa’s lair. It was great action, but ultimately failed to build any real suspense or drama with regards to the gaze. Additionally, the decision to film Medusa as 100% CGI didn’t really work because she just wasn’t believable in her facial reactions. Actually, she seemed very plain-jane and unthreatening in anyway. The decision to portray Andromeda as somewhat disconnected from the rest of the story didn’t really help the production all that much, either.
If you want a good action film with plenty of monsters, than Clash of the Titans is going to fit that niche pretty well. If you wanted a modern interpretation of Greek Mythology, you’re much better served watching the Percy Jackson movie.
3.5 (maybe leaning toward 4) out of 5.
1408
I haven’t really been a fan of Stephen King for a number of years. Sometime around the early 90’s, his writing became somewhat stale for me and his stories didn’t really take me anyplace I hadn’t already been before. He also had a way with writing various characters as stereotypes instead of truly fleshed out characters with real thoughts and desires, they became more like caricatures of previous characters he’d already dealt with and continued to deal with as each main character was either a writer or some variation on the same theme. Kings’ work simply stopped impressing me when I was old enough to stop believing in stereotypes. I did, however, read the story from which this movie is based and I was… bored. Honestly, it didn’t shock or amaze or horrify me. It was bland and typical of the kind of stuff King had been writing for years. So I didn’t feel any real need to watch the movie when it was released some short years back.
My wife, however, decided to rent it and so I pretty much just lounged back and watched it with her. The fairly standard “haunted room” story had some pretty good things going for it, including a fantastic performance from lead actor, John Cusack. The room almost immediately begins to move in on Cusack, who plays the stereotypical “Stephen King Writer” looking for a story as he seeks to debunk haunted room myths in various hotels. He’s got alcohol problems, he’s just recently quit smoking but constantly carries a last cigarette in case the world ends, and he’s avoiding any sort of resolution with the death of his only child. There’s also some vague “father-son” relationship issues, as well… so John Cusack is playing yet another small version of Kings alter-ego as he comes face to face with the horror of this one haunted room.
All in all, the film was pretty much a standard little ghost story with some good special effects and nothing much more important than that. It was a popcorn-muncher that kept my wife interested and didn’t bore me to tears, so for that it gets an unremarkable …
3 out of 5.
Zombies of Mass Destruction
Let’s bring on the grue with this selection from the much-declined in popularity “After Dark Horror Fest” featuring one of the better movies on the selection list in recent years. ZMD is part parody, and probably much more parody than it originally intended to become as a small conservative community is besieged by a plague of zombies. There are several references to the war with Iraq, neo-conservatism, prejudice, and the list goes on and on and on. This whole movie would almost seem like a slap in the face insult to conservative idealism if they hadn’t set up all the characters as flat out parodies of the things they were supposed to represent. There’s a minister struggling with a change of the times, his faith, and his “fire and brimstone” sermons regarding the nature of sin and role of his flock at the end of times. There’s a conservative mayor whose policies have become meaningless and lack the growth of an ever-changing world. The prototypical redneck “walmart” family of over enthusiastic bigots makes their own colorful narrative to the disaster at large, and we also have the struggling immigrant who has worked his fingers to the bone and yet finds his culture mocked and dismissed by his fellow neighbors. We’re given these outlandishly boorish stereotypes to boo while simultaneously offered a series of likely heroes to cheer; The immigrants’ daughter struggling with her cultural identity, the liberal teacher wants to drag her community to the present and open their minds and hearts to a world that is changing around them, and the homosexual couple who are only recently coming out of the closet. The whole formula could have worked as a largely insulting film with a far Left agenda but is, actually, so self parodying that it works to the opposite affect in many cases. When one member of the Ministers’ flock reveals a heavy collection of guns with typical far-right machismo regarding the Second Amendment, you can’t really find fault when the church is surrounded by flesh-eating zombies. You’re more likely to groan when the teacher talks about her hatred of guns, or laugh out loud at the utterly preposterous notions of what people on the Left actually think of conservatives. It’s so unbelievably stereotypical that you wind up shaking your head in shock.
One area where they get the film dead right, however, is in the two homosexual protagonists and their struggle with coming out of the closet and finding acceptance in a community that they honestly fear. These two characters have some of the best written dialogue throughout the feature and they are also the least stereotypical personalities in the film. They pretty much carry the bulk of the film, fighting off the zombie hordes with heroic flair before eventually finding shelter within the Reverends’ church. The film utterly fails, however, to really bring the same sort of connection its’ female lead who is captured by a neighboring family and tortured for information regarding “her terrorist attack” on their community. It sort of comes across as an overly awkward parody given the situation with the rest of the film.
4 out of 5 and one of the best entries yet in the annual 8 Movies to Die For selection.
Atropia
I am a multi-layered geek with interests in a number of things, from comics to games to movies and pulp novel book flings. So when Netflix recommended this title from Norway, featuring an awkward title and a subcategory in “romantic comedy” I nearly clicked this thing out of existence in order to pump some more filth out of the horror category when some keywords in the plot caught my eye… Role-playing Games? I clicked the “add” button and then threw it up to the top ten films behind several movies that have been on “long wait” for the past month or so… not expecting to get it so soon, but being pleasantly surprised when I popped it in the DVD player for a tumble.
Atropia is a haven for nerds in a small Norwegian town, and it’s the only place willing to hire a young socialite after her world come tumbling down. Her car salesman boyfriend is jailed after cooking his books for some unknown amount of time, she’s forced to move in with her sister and nephew, and the constant pressure from news organizations makes it hard for the young woman to find work or even a reprieve from the stress of her boyfriends’ situation. So she takes her nephew to the local comic book store where she manages to find employment and even a sort of purpose when she’s placed in charge of their role-playing games and helps to manage their books. Not at all comfortable in her new setting, the girl manages to learn what RPG’s are, in addition to finding friendship and companionship with the “nerds” of the store who also manage to find a true friend in our main character.
So there’s no blood, no death, no massive amounts of gore, cussing, or over the top action in any way but “Atropia” still manages to take the prize for best movie of the week by simply being an engaging story with likeable characters. It was easy to identify with the stores colorful characters because I tend to spend my time with the same types; nerdy geeks who love their games, their comics, their movies, and their friendships and just glorify their nerd-itude with pride.
5 out of 5.
Sam Worthington headlines Clash of the Titans, a remake of the original 80’s fantasy feature that many people consider a classic in the genre. It’s a theatrical adaptation of Greek Mythology and the story of Perseus, a son of Zeus. Using several gifts from the gods, the young man sets out to slay the Gorgon Medusa and win the hand of Andromeda. The original took several liberties with the story, but yet managed to keep hold to several key factors in the myth. For those of you curious, I suggest you use this wonderful on-line medium to Wikepedia the mythology or do some research of your own… it would probably be far more research than the writers of the “remake” script ever attempted. The story is only marginally similar to the Mythology and then only somewhat less disjointed from the original film. Worthington is quickly proving himself as a magnetic leading man for action films, but much of the film tends to rely more on the Captain of the Guard in order to supply us with an identifiable character while the story continues to introduce a variety of characters who lend their support to Perseus.
The film moves at an exciting pace and tells a good story about a young man coming to grips with his dual nature and the legacy of his bloodline. He has no wish to be a hero or a son of Zeus, preferring the solace of a simple life as a fisherman. Unfortunately, the gods are upset with the world of man because they are no longer worshipped and adored, while the world of men have grown resentful of the power and prestige of the Gods. Events spiral out of his control, and Perseus is forced to take up a mantle in order to defend the city of Joppa from the ravages of the Kraken. Alternatively, the Princess Andromeda may also sacrifice herself to the beast in order to spare her city and her people. These events are being masterminded by Hades, whose desires are fueled by revenge against his brother Zeus for trapping him within the damned earth and presiding over the dead souls that enter Tartarus. Look, I’m trying to keep with the topic at hand and discuss the story but it leaps and flips from one point to another at various stages with the introduction of several characters and the rise of one threat after another. Kalibos emerges as a pawn for Hades, given a glutton of powers to stand in the way of Perseus, and yappity yapyapyap… I think you get the point.
In many places, the film manages to entertain and excite with a number of battle scenes and several monsters that crash and bang across the screen. Perseus’ battle with the giant Scorpions is the stuff of fantastic movie making, with a number of terrific stunts and creeping tensions as the creatures rise from the sands of a strange desert. His confrontation of the three fate witches leaves no room for complaint. His battle with the Kraken itself is absolutely fantastic, with an additional obstacle of three harpies who attempt to steal the Medusa’s head from our hero before he can complete his task. The threat of the gods is ever present in the form of an obsessive street preacher whose devotion to Hades is only matched by his addiction to crack as he screams and blubbers his way from one scene to the next. Unlike the original film, we are also given time to build a relationship with those who travel alongside Perseus so that their various sacrifices hold deeper meaning when they take place. The film is, ultimately, a very good adventure film with some good acting and a decent amount of direction.
Where the film goes wrong, however… it REALLY goes wrong. In what I can only assume was another “robot Spider” moment in production meetings, Perseus is joined in his quest by one of the Djinn… ancient sorcerers bound and imprisoned by Solomon in the Old Testament with a fair amount of mythology surrounding their existence to begin with. Nowhere in the Myth of Perseus, but someone really REALLY wanted to film some Djinn and I suppose this is the movie where they managed to get their keen idea thrown in. Another epic failure was in execution of the quest through Medusa’s lair. It was great action, but ultimately failed to build any real suspense or drama with regards to the gaze. Additionally, the decision to film Medusa as 100% CGI didn’t really work because she just wasn’t believable in her facial reactions. Actually, she seemed very plain-jane and unthreatening in anyway. The decision to portray Andromeda as somewhat disconnected from the rest of the story didn’t really help the production all that much, either.
If you want a good action film with plenty of monsters, than Clash of the Titans is going to fit that niche pretty well. If you wanted a modern interpretation of Greek Mythology, you’re much better served watching the Percy Jackson movie.
3.5 (maybe leaning toward 4) out of 5.
1408
I haven’t really been a fan of Stephen King for a number of years. Sometime around the early 90’s, his writing became somewhat stale for me and his stories didn’t really take me anyplace I hadn’t already been before. He also had a way with writing various characters as stereotypes instead of truly fleshed out characters with real thoughts and desires, they became more like caricatures of previous characters he’d already dealt with and continued to deal with as each main character was either a writer or some variation on the same theme. Kings’ work simply stopped impressing me when I was old enough to stop believing in stereotypes. I did, however, read the story from which this movie is based and I was… bored. Honestly, it didn’t shock or amaze or horrify me. It was bland and typical of the kind of stuff King had been writing for years. So I didn’t feel any real need to watch the movie when it was released some short years back.
My wife, however, decided to rent it and so I pretty much just lounged back and watched it with her. The fairly standard “haunted room” story had some pretty good things going for it, including a fantastic performance from lead actor, John Cusack. The room almost immediately begins to move in on Cusack, who plays the stereotypical “Stephen King Writer” looking for a story as he seeks to debunk haunted room myths in various hotels. He’s got alcohol problems, he’s just recently quit smoking but constantly carries a last cigarette in case the world ends, and he’s avoiding any sort of resolution with the death of his only child. There’s also some vague “father-son” relationship issues, as well… so John Cusack is playing yet another small version of Kings alter-ego as he comes face to face with the horror of this one haunted room.
All in all, the film was pretty much a standard little ghost story with some good special effects and nothing much more important than that. It was a popcorn-muncher that kept my wife interested and didn’t bore me to tears, so for that it gets an unremarkable …
3 out of 5.
Zombies of Mass Destruction
Let’s bring on the grue with this selection from the much-declined in popularity “After Dark Horror Fest” featuring one of the better movies on the selection list in recent years. ZMD is part parody, and probably much more parody than it originally intended to become as a small conservative community is besieged by a plague of zombies. There are several references to the war with Iraq, neo-conservatism, prejudice, and the list goes on and on and on. This whole movie would almost seem like a slap in the face insult to conservative idealism if they hadn’t set up all the characters as flat out parodies of the things they were supposed to represent. There’s a minister struggling with a change of the times, his faith, and his “fire and brimstone” sermons regarding the nature of sin and role of his flock at the end of times. There’s a conservative mayor whose policies have become meaningless and lack the growth of an ever-changing world. The prototypical redneck “walmart” family of over enthusiastic bigots makes their own colorful narrative to the disaster at large, and we also have the struggling immigrant who has worked his fingers to the bone and yet finds his culture mocked and dismissed by his fellow neighbors. We’re given these outlandishly boorish stereotypes to boo while simultaneously offered a series of likely heroes to cheer; The immigrants’ daughter struggling with her cultural identity, the liberal teacher wants to drag her community to the present and open their minds and hearts to a world that is changing around them, and the homosexual couple who are only recently coming out of the closet. The whole formula could have worked as a largely insulting film with a far Left agenda but is, actually, so self parodying that it works to the opposite affect in many cases. When one member of the Ministers’ flock reveals a heavy collection of guns with typical far-right machismo regarding the Second Amendment, you can’t really find fault when the church is surrounded by flesh-eating zombies. You’re more likely to groan when the teacher talks about her hatred of guns, or laugh out loud at the utterly preposterous notions of what people on the Left actually think of conservatives. It’s so unbelievably stereotypical that you wind up shaking your head in shock.
One area where they get the film dead right, however, is in the two homosexual protagonists and their struggle with coming out of the closet and finding acceptance in a community that they honestly fear. These two characters have some of the best written dialogue throughout the feature and they are also the least stereotypical personalities in the film. They pretty much carry the bulk of the film, fighting off the zombie hordes with heroic flair before eventually finding shelter within the Reverends’ church. The film utterly fails, however, to really bring the same sort of connection its’ female lead who is captured by a neighboring family and tortured for information regarding “her terrorist attack” on their community. It sort of comes across as an overly awkward parody given the situation with the rest of the film.
4 out of 5 and one of the best entries yet in the annual 8 Movies to Die For selection.
Atropia
I am a multi-layered geek with interests in a number of things, from comics to games to movies and pulp novel book flings. So when Netflix recommended this title from Norway, featuring an awkward title and a subcategory in “romantic comedy” I nearly clicked this thing out of existence in order to pump some more filth out of the horror category when some keywords in the plot caught my eye… Role-playing Games? I clicked the “add” button and then threw it up to the top ten films behind several movies that have been on “long wait” for the past month or so… not expecting to get it so soon, but being pleasantly surprised when I popped it in the DVD player for a tumble.
Atropia is a haven for nerds in a small Norwegian town, and it’s the only place willing to hire a young socialite after her world come tumbling down. Her car salesman boyfriend is jailed after cooking his books for some unknown amount of time, she’s forced to move in with her sister and nephew, and the constant pressure from news organizations makes it hard for the young woman to find work or even a reprieve from the stress of her boyfriends’ situation. So she takes her nephew to the local comic book store where she manages to find employment and even a sort of purpose when she’s placed in charge of their role-playing games and helps to manage their books. Not at all comfortable in her new setting, the girl manages to learn what RPG’s are, in addition to finding friendship and companionship with the “nerds” of the store who also manage to find a true friend in our main character.
So there’s no blood, no death, no massive amounts of gore, cussing, or over the top action in any way but “Atropia” still manages to take the prize for best movie of the week by simply being an engaging story with likeable characters. It was easy to identify with the stores colorful characters because I tend to spend my time with the same types; nerdy geeks who love their games, their comics, their movies, and their friendships and just glorify their nerd-itude with pride.
5 out of 5.
The Crap Shack vlog show, Episode 2!!!
This is an embedded video for my Vlog, viewable by looking at either my youtube page or at my blog sight.
redcapjack.blogspot.com
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