My wife is a patient, loving, and caring soul. But she really is not really backing me up on my annual tradition, and that's okay. But one of the things that frustrates her is that my movie picks are often confusing, she is also frustrated with my flat out refusing to watch some movies, and she simply doesn't understand THE RULES.
UNO: Films that specifically take place during Halloween are all eligible, regardless of genre.
(Arsenic and Old Lace, et al)
TWO-O: Horror films that have no set time period may also be eligible.
(Alien, et al.)
THREE-P-O: Films with a dark supernatural flair may also be eligible with caveats.
* I call this the Ghost rule, because it's not horror but it has ghosts.*
FOUR-E-O-E-O: the following traits disqualify a film : Any other holiday (Other than Friday the 13th which CAN occur during the fall).
Saturday, October 26, 2019
Wednesday, October 9, 2019
Some Reviews... short and sweet. Halloween Fest 2019
HOUSE OF THE WITCH
A fairly standard and formulaic horror flick. A couple of teens head out to the local "haunted" house where they are systematically killed by the ghost of a Witch that had died some hundred or more years prior. Look, the story wasn't all that compelling but the film wasn't actually very bad. Nor was it very good. It was just sort of there and was a decent hour and a half spent for a horror fan. There's no reinvention of the wheel, here.
5 out of 10.
THE FURIES
A fairly standard and formulaic horror flick. A couple of teens head out to the local "haunted" house where they are systematically killed by the ghost of a Witch that had died some hundred or more years prior. Look, the story wasn't all that compelling but the film wasn't actually very bad. Nor was it very good. It was just sort of there and was a decent hour and a half spent for a horror fan. There's no reinvention of the wheel, here.
5 out of 10.
THE FURIES
Is the game over? Is there an escape?
The monsters are coming... one after the other, the monsters will come and they will kill them all, one after the other. When Kayla wakes up in a box, she finds herself the target of a hunt. But she's not the only one, as other women are also waking up locked in boxes and being hunted by masked maniacs. Each maniac is linked to the victims in a way that is revealed through the film.
High gore meter ups the ante of what looked like a fairly standard torture-porn slasher flick. The film makers probably thought they were making some sort of statement regarding misogyny, but I think they missed the mark and wanted the film to be more than it was. But as a fun gory romp, the movie delivers on the goods.
8.5 out of 10.
IN THE TALL GRASS
The monsters are coming... one after the other, the monsters will come and they will kill them all, one after the other. When Kayla wakes up in a box, she finds herself the target of a hunt. But she's not the only one, as other women are also waking up locked in boxes and being hunted by masked maniacs. Each maniac is linked to the victims in a way that is revealed through the film.
High gore meter ups the ante of what looked like a fairly standard torture-porn slasher flick. The film makers probably thought they were making some sort of statement regarding misogyny, but I think they missed the mark and wanted the film to be more than it was. But as a fun gory romp, the movie delivers on the goods.
8.5 out of 10.
IN THE TALL GRASS
Around this time last year I was watching "Gerald's Game" on
Netflix. And this year they repeated the success of that film with
another King adaptation, though this one also receives a co-writer
credit from King's son, Joe Hill. The two crafted a brilliantly
claustrophobic story that could almost happen to anyone- getting lost in
a field of tall grass. But there's something dark about this field,
something very twisted, and everything becomes lost in this film where
neither time nor space continue to play by the rules.
And if there is one thing I love, it's the twisting reality of cosmic horror and the fear of the unknown.
Vincent Natali is no stranger to claustrophobia, having previously explored the subject in Cube. He masterfully take advantage of the surrounding field and builds on the suspense endangering the pregnant Becky (Laysla De Oliveira) and her brother Cal (Avery Whitted). While trying to help a young boy find his way out of the field, they find themselves separated and hopelessly lost. But most of the film's menace comes from the boys father, unnervingly played by Patrick Wilson.
If you're looking for a pretty decent halloween jaunt, this one won't lead you astray.
8 out of 10.
CROCODYLUS
Some sort of gator-croc-humanoid hybrid thing that just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Over acted, underfunded, and unfortunately available on Amazon Prime this creature feature makes the Asylum films look like big budget Hollywood features. A small town sheriff has to contend with devious scientists, distraught(?) parents, crooked politicians, and a monstrous creature of dubious origins. Ancient Indian rituals are involved, so is toxic waste, so is genetic experimentation, as is medical testing, and the list goes on- and people are incapable of speaking like actual humans while reciting lines written by someone who has definitely seen the movie JAWS a few times in his life.
You can skip this one unless you really enjoy bad creature flicks.
2 out of 10
EAT LOCALS
And if there is one thing I love, it's the twisting reality of cosmic horror and the fear of the unknown.
Vincent Natali is no stranger to claustrophobia, having previously explored the subject in Cube. He masterfully take advantage of the surrounding field and builds on the suspense endangering the pregnant Becky (Laysla De Oliveira) and her brother Cal (Avery Whitted). While trying to help a young boy find his way out of the field, they find themselves separated and hopelessly lost. But most of the film's menace comes from the boys father, unnervingly played by Patrick Wilson.
If you're looking for a pretty decent halloween jaunt, this one won't lead you astray.
8 out of 10.
CROCODYLUS
Some sort of gator-croc-humanoid hybrid thing that just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Over acted, underfunded, and unfortunately available on Amazon Prime this creature feature makes the Asylum films look like big budget Hollywood features. A small town sheriff has to contend with devious scientists, distraught(?) parents, crooked politicians, and a monstrous creature of dubious origins. Ancient Indian rituals are involved, so is toxic waste, so is genetic experimentation, as is medical testing, and the list goes on- and people are incapable of speaking like actual humans while reciting lines written by someone who has definitely seen the movie JAWS a few times in his life.
You can skip this one unless you really enjoy bad creature flicks.
2 out of 10
EAT LOCALS
Adding to my Halloween 2019 list, I'm not entirely certain how I
managed to miss this entertaining vampire romp from across the pond but
I'm glad I found it streaming on Amazon Prime tonight. Charlie Cox
(Daredevil), Freema Agyeman (Doctor Who), and Eve Myles (Torchwood) are
among the well established cast fanging it up in this campy
horror-comedy.
Every fifty years or so, this small council of vampires meet to discuss old feuds, territory, debate food quotas, and vote on new members to the council. On this evening, there will be a few unexpected guests and arrivals. Primarily, the group is introduced to a young Romani man (Billy Cook) brought in as a guest by the seductress, Vanessa (Eve Myles, noted above). And then, a group of vampire hunters waiting in ambush surrounding the farmhouse where the group is meeting.
Who you root for throughout the film may change throughout various moments, as we get to know all of the characters involved. Peppered with the rather typical dry British humor you might expect, the film doesn't flinch from the grue and gore that horror fans just love to see.
Satisfying 7 out of 10.
Keep up on the rest of my 31 Days of Halloween Horror Flicks through Letterboxd.
31 DAYS OF HORROR
And as always, feel free to leave comments below.
Every fifty years or so, this small council of vampires meet to discuss old feuds, territory, debate food quotas, and vote on new members to the council. On this evening, there will be a few unexpected guests and arrivals. Primarily, the group is introduced to a young Romani man (Billy Cook) brought in as a guest by the seductress, Vanessa (Eve Myles, noted above). And then, a group of vampire hunters waiting in ambush surrounding the farmhouse where the group is meeting.
Who you root for throughout the film may change throughout various moments, as we get to know all of the characters involved. Peppered with the rather typical dry British humor you might expect, the film doesn't flinch from the grue and gore that horror fans just love to see.
Satisfying 7 out of 10.
Keep up on the rest of my 31 Days of Halloween Horror Flicks through Letterboxd.
31 DAYS OF HORROR
And as always, feel free to leave comments below.
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